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An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...
Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer: Ma\'am, you were speeding.
Older Woman: Oh, I see.
Officer: Can I see your license please?
Older Woman: I\'d give it to you but I don\'t have
one.
Officer: Don\'t have one?
Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
Officer: I see... Can I see your vehicle
registration papers please.
Older Woman: I can\'t do that.
Officer: Why not?
Older Woman: I stole this car.
Officer: Stole it?
Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the
owner.
Officer: You what?
Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in
the trunk if you want to see.
The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
Officer 2: Ma\'am, could you step out of your
vehicle please! The woman steps out of
her vehicle.
Older woman: Is there a problem sir?
Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have
stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Older Woman: Murdered the owner?
Officer 2: Yes, could you open the trunk of your
car, please.
The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty space.
Officer 2: Is this your car, ma\'am?
Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
The officer is quite stunned.
Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do
not have a driving license.
The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.
The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.
Officer 2: Thank you ma\'am, one of my officers told
me you didn\'t have a license, that you
stole this car, and that you murdered
and hacked up the owner.
Older Woman (Shocked & horrified): Bet the liar
told you I was
speeding, too.